A Russian President Selling Illegal Beer

Note: This is a continuation of my recent trip to Poland.  Read the first part here.

A cool old beer truck in Warsaw. (click to see larger)Two things that I really enjoy are trains and beer.  They’re great by themselves, but it’s an unstoppable situation when you mix them together.  If I have the option to ride a train, I’ll pick it over nearly any other form of transport.  And if it’s possible to drink some beer on this train, I will definitely make sure that happens.

I spent the majority of my trip to Poland in the capital city of Warsaw, but my buddy Jake and I decided that we needed to get out of the big city and see something else.  He started suggesting bus times, and I almost punched him in the face, so we redirected the plan to the train station.  I don’t know the time or price difference of the two means of transport, and frankly, I don’t care.

We were asking our (not very helpful) hostel staff about train times, prices, and when to go.  She told us that the time and day that we were going is the worst possible, but we shouldn’t have any trouble getting tickets.  Since it was Easter weekend, everyone would be leaving the city for their hometowns to spend the holiday with their family.  She said something like, “It’s not like an Indian train where people will be hanging out the windows and sitting on the roof, but it’ll be pretty close to that.”

I assumed we would need plenty of beer for this one.

The train station was a mad house, and after about 30 minutes in line, we were able to buy our tickets.  Somehow we managed to get an “Under 26” discount on one of them, but not the other – confusing since we’re the same age and tried to buy two.  It wasn’t worth getting back in line to try to exchange it.

Warsaw had some pretty areas... (click to see larger)We found the track (or so we thought) and went searching for a store to buy some sandwich stuff and the necessary beverages.  Conveniently, the train station was attached to a mall that had a big supermarket in it.  Time was short, so we frantically ran around the store (that was even more crowded than the train station) and threw various items in our baskets.

Finally, we went to pay and realized that there was only one line and it had about 100 people in it.  After thinking I might have to eat my food or die of starvation before I can even pay, I realized that it had a system to it all.  There were between 10 and 20 cash registers, and when you got to the front of the line, an machine would ding and show  the number of an open one.  It all seemed very efficient.

I let my buddy go first thinking it would be quicker if I went to the next open one instead of trying to leapfrog onto his cashier.  DING.  Lucky number 13 came up.  I counted my way down the line of numbers until I noticed that it ended at 12.  But I was supposed to go to 13.  But 12 was the last one.  Uh-oh.

...and many not so pretty places. (click to see larger)Past checkout 12, there were a few little counters that looked more like a place where people would return things or do other customer service related transactions.  They didn’t look like good old number 13, but I had to go somewhere, and I couldn’t go back to that zoo of a line.  If I tried to start all over, I would miss my train.  Desperate times call for desperate measures.

Then, one of the guys at these little checkouts starts waving frantically and yelling at me.  His arm motions said to come over here and hurry, but his tone of voice and body language seemed similar to a momma bear when you are considering approaching her cubs.  With no other options, I pushed forward.

The guy looked so familiar, but I couldn’t figure out why.  It seemed like I knew him from somewhere, or maybe I had just seen pictures of him.  But who was he?  I’d been in Warsaw for a few days, maybe our paths had already crossed.

I didn’t have time to think about it because the fear inspired by his words jabbered in an unknown tongue caused me to put my basket on the counter.  It’s a trend that I’m used to at smaller places like this.  The cashier can take it right out of your basket, scan it, and stick it in another basket so you can bag it up out of their way.

He didn’t like this plan.

Yelling something at me, I told him that I didn’t understand and asked if he spoke English.  The message of my sentence got across, but it didn’t change his attitude at all.  He kept pointing at my basket and shouting.  So, I took it off, put it on the floor, and started to unload it.  He also didn’t like this.  I tried putting it on the bagging area of the checkout to my left.  He really didn’t like this.

Through all the shouting, I realized I had one option – be like him.  I turned my basket upside down so the stuff all fell out in front of him, tossed it away, and gave him a dirty look.  He returned the glare but stopped shouting.

Maybe a bike with flowers is a common Polish form of transportation. (click to see larger)Once he was quiet for a second, I realized exactly why he was so familiar.  He was the spitting image of Vladimir Putin, the Russian President (or whatever title he calls himself this week).  I’m pretty convinced that this guy is Vlad’s twin brother who was exiled to a Warsaw grocery store to prevent any competition, and that’s why he was so pissed off.

After some more yelling on both sides, I parted with the last of my cash.  I was going to use my debit card to eliminate the necessity of finding another ATM, but I didn’t feel like going down that road with Cashier Putin.

I bagged my groceries, watched him yell at the next customer, and headed towards my train.

Oh yes, the train.  That’s another great story, but I’ll save it for another day.  It involves a pirate and the beginning of my life as a fugitive in the Polish countryside…

 A Polish beer billboard! (click to see larger)

Polish word of the day:

Dziękuję

I struggled with the pronunciation of this word the whole trip, and I never really did get it down.  Since then, I’ve forgotten it completely, so don’t even ask me how to say it.  It means „thank you”.  Not surprisingly, I didn’t say it at the grocery store.

Sick (Because) Of Working

This is a fancy gate for a university. I guess it's motivation to go to school! (click to see larger)Spring Break is usually a time where people go on a hot vacation.  It’s associated with beaches, sand, boats, and drinks with little umbrellas in them.  Mine wasn’t warm.  Instead it was cold, grey, windy, and slightly rainy.

It’s my own fault.

I do like relaxing, but my favorite trips are usually the adventuresome ones.  So, I turned in the beach towel to head north and explore a country that’s eluded me so far.  Poland.  It’s a place that I never had much desire to visit, but I changed my thoughts after my recent post asking for advice.  It came so highly recommended that I couldn’t resist.

Decision made.  Take a train there, meet my friend halfway through the week.  Fly back.  Simple.

Nope.  Travelling is never, ever simple.  Something always goes wrong.

In this case, I got sick a few days before I was to leave.  Before I act like I’m looking for pity, take note that this was the first time of my entire career in Hungary that I took time off of work for being sick.  When I look at my work day in 45 minute increments, it makes it difficult to justify needing to spend time at home in my bed.  This time, however, I was miserable enough to throw in the towel halfway through a Wednesday.

There were a lot of murals on the sides of buildings in Warsaw. (click to see larger)After a visit to a doctor (a story for another day), I was given some medicine that was supposed to help.  It did its job, but not fast enough to make me eager for a 10 hour train ride on Saturday morning.  So, I hopped on my computer and compared travel times and prices until it became obvious that I should just wait and hop on a plane Wednesday night with my buddy.  Fortunately, discount airlines offer you this kind of convenience (even if they deprive you of all others).

The days of rest and relaxation were worthwhile.  They made me into a sluggish, zombie-like traveler instead of the full grown crybaby that a tougher trip would’ve created.  Although I didn’t feel 100%, I still managed to enjoy myself.

I took a lot of pictures and had as many funny experiences as I could.  Look for them to come soon.  My only warning is that you wear a sweater while reading.  As I said at the beginning, it was grey and cold the whole time.  That really helped me get a speedy recovery.

 These guys were working really hard to hold up this building (click to see larger).

Hungarian word of the day:

Repülőtér

It’s pronounced „Reh-poo-luuh-tear”, and this word means „Airport”.  It’s what you may have to ask directions to if you’re intending to get out of Hungary.  Take my advice, though, if you’re sick, go somewhere warm and sunny.

The Shortest Weekend Of All Time

I saw some sort of orchestra practicing today. It was pretty cool! (click image to see larger)Weekends are my favorite time of the week becasue you’re free to do whatever you want.  You make your own schedule, plan your own commitments, and do it all at your own pace.  It’s a glorious time of freedom and excitement.

Well, usually.  Not this weekend.

On occasion, the Hungarian school system finds it necessary to have classes on Saturday (remember when I talked about it last year?).  This was one of those days.  One of the big national holidays was March 15^th (Thursday of the week before last), and everyone had the day off for it.  So as to not have an awkward one day back at school, they cancelled Friday as well.  Four day weekend!

The downside?  The following weekend is only one day.  Last Friday was moved to this Saturday and the gears of the school machine kept turning.  Those gears needed some oil, though, because they were squeaking with complaints from everyone.

This many headed dog thing has nothing to do with the story. It's just on the wall of the cafe I'm sitting in, and I really like it. (click image to see larger)Unfortunately, that’s not where it ends.  It gets worse.  The one weekend day, Sunday, wasn’t a full day.  It conveniently contained the daylight savings time change of setting the clocks forward an hour.  That’s the time when you lose an hour.

In other words, my weekend was only made up of one day, and it was 23 hours long.

That’s a lot of easy motivation to get you through a week.  The bright light at the end of the tunnel is only 23 hours.  But, those 23 hours are more strategically positioned to take advantage of the suns light.  I guess that should count for something.

 The light certainly looked good on this building. Will that be different after the time change? (click image to see larger)

Hungarian word of the day:

Nap

It’s pronounced “Naw-p”, and it means “sun”.  It also means “day”.  Some jokes can be made with that, especially when you cross the boundaries into English.  “I’m going to take a nap because I’m tired.”  “Are you stealing the sun or the day?”

Where To Go, That I Don’t Know

Trains are the most fun way to travel, use them! (click to see larger)One of the reasons that I came to Hungary was because of where it is located.  It’s a landlocked country that has strange lands on all sides of it.  You can take a train, car, bus, bike, canoe, hang glider, rollerblades, or any other conceivable form of transportation and end up in a different country without having to cover much distance.

Sounds great, right?  It is, but it has it’s pros and cons.  Imagine you had a huge craving for something sweet and cold, so you went into an ice cream shop.  Now pretend that they had 2 million different flavors that all looked tasty.  How do you decide?  That’s the decision I’m facing now.

I’m a little over a week away from my spring break, and, as usual, I haven’t decided where to go.  There were good deals on discount flights to anywhere in Europe, but those are becoming more scarce as the time draws closer.  But, trains and buses could easily get me to a new land.  All I have to do is decide which.

So, I’m going ask for your help.  Where do you think I should go?  Let me lay out some of the places that I’m considering, but feel free to suggest anywhere else.  I have about a week off of school (ten days, I think), and keep in mind that I get paid a Hungarian teaching salary – translation:  cheap is good.

 My experiences in restaurant cars have always been awesome, is that a general feeling? (click to see larger)

Bosnia - A nation that wasn’t even on my list of places to go until I realized it’s right next door, but putting that aside, I’ve heard a lot of good things about this country.  I was attracted to the city that hosted the spark of World War I, but rumor has it that there are a few other incredible towns around. 

Pros:  It’s close and reasonable priced (and easy to plan at the last minute).

Cons:  I don’t know if there are enough things to occupy me for 10 days.

If this was my car, I would definitely be driving somewhere! (click to see larger)Ukraine -  An intriguing country that I really don’t know much about.  It’s another neighbor of Hungary, but it’s at the far corner and it seems that the cool places are deep in the country.

Pros:  I could take trains and/or buses and I think the prices are good.

Cons:  I think it takes a long time to travel there by train, and I’m not sure how easy it is to get around once I’m actually in the country.

Bulgaria – This is higher up on my list, but I think I’d have to fly and the flights aren’t very cheap at such a late date.  Plus, Istanbul is a city that I’d really like to go to, and it may be easier to see both of these places at once.

Pros:  I’ve heard it’s very cheap once you’re there.

Cons:  Getting a flight there wouldn’t be cheap.

Trains are great, but there's a lot of time spent waiting in stations (not always in the best weather). (click to see larger)Poland – It’s a popular country to visit, but one that has never really been that attractive to me (I don’t have a good reason why).  However, I rarely hear anything bad about it, so it’s probably worth visiting.

Pros:  I can get there by trains, and I’m under the impression that the infrastructure is fairly modern, so it would be easy to get around.

Cons:  I’m just not that excited about it.

Greece -  There were (I stress the past tense) cheap flights to Greece, but I was thinking of using it more as a starting point.  I’d like to explore some more of the former Yugoslavian countries, but I don’t know how easy it really is to get from one place to the other.

Pros:  If I could get around, I could go to some off the beaten track locations.

Cons:  The flight fares have gone up, and I don’t know for sure that I could get to the places I’d really like to go.

Those aren’t all my options, those are just the first five that I thought of.  Let me know that you think.  Have you been to them and liked them or not liked them?  Have you not been there but always wished you have?  Does one sound like a great idea or horrible idea simply because you don’t like the name?  Any reasoning is welcome!

 The form of transportation isn't important, but it's time for me to cross some borders like this one into Italy. (click to see larger)

Hungarian word of the day:

Határ

This word is pronounced “Hot-aar” (the second part is kind of like what  pirate says), and it means “Border”.  It’s my intention to cross at least one border on my next trip because I haven’t been out of Hungary since I left for Christmas.  That must be some sort of record for me.

The Underground World Of Beer-dapest

A bar waiting to serve it's thirsty customers. (click to see larger)“Um, can you put that beer in your coat when you leave…” the shopkeeper awkwardly asks.

“Persze,” I respond.  Of course.

The legality of buying beer in Budapest has become a grey area.  In other words, it’s illegal to buy it in certain places at certain times.  Fortunately, sticking with Hungarian tradition, the people are willing to resist.

Budapest is divided into 23 districts, and each one has their own laws.  Much of the exciting, central part of Pest is located in 5^th district.  In a move that’s probably not coincidental, it happens to be illegal to buy any sort of alcohol after 10:00 P.M. in this district.

Don’t hate the people who make the rules.  They probably have much more logic than simply wanting to prevent people from having fun on a Friday night.  I assume they think it will cut down on problems caused by drunk people such as graffiti, litter, and fighting in the streets.

Dreher is one of the most common Hungarian beers. (click to see larger)Does it work?  Well, not in my opinion.  There are still just as many drunk people, except they usually have to go to bars and pay a lot more for a drink.  In a way, that does help the local economy, so it’s not all bad.

On the other hand, a creative person can bend the rules a little bit.  There are a lot of little stores that are open 24 hours, but some are more noticeable than others.  If you go to one on a main intersection or in a very popular bar-hopping neighborhood,  they will refuse to sell any beer to you late at night.  Period.  End of story.  Don’t try to argue, it won’t work.

The streets at night. Notice the reflection of the "walk" man on the side of the car - awesome! (click to see larger)Follow my advice, though, and you will not be thirsty.  If you find a small, discrete shop on a side street, you’re chances of success are far greater.  You should enter the store without appearing drunk, be polite to the store owner, buy a bag of pretzels (very cheap, and you know you want them), and just one beer.  Don’t ask if you’re allowed, just act casual and in control.  Put your purchases on the counter, and get out your money.

Many times this will result in the shopkeeper turning his back on the rules and selling it to you.  After all, that’s where his paycheck comes from.  He’ll ask you to tuck it away where no one on the street will see you leaving with it, and you’ll happily comply.

I still don't understand why a non-alcoholic beer is a big advertising point, but I guess they're proud of it. (click to see larger)This whole interaction relates back to a time-tested Hungarian characteristic:  standing up to oppression.  For a people that have been occupied nearly continuously for hundreds of years, the Hungarians have become quite talented at unifying to fight back, even in the smallest of ways.

Even though we’re not fighting the Turks, the Austrians, the Russians, or anyone like that, it still feels pretty cool to stick it to the evil government bureaucrats of the 5^th district.  It sounds the plot of a cheesy science-fiction movie.  Oh well, what should I expect when I decide to write about buying a beer at a convenience store?

 Finish your drinks, and you're allowed to go home. (click to see larger)

Hungarian word of the day:

Kerület

It’s pronounced Care-oo-let, and it means “District”.  You’ll see and hear it a lot if you come to Budapest, because you’ll need it to find your way around.